SELFISH!

Waaahh! For the first time in my life I told someone he is selfish.
I was not able to sleep that night partly because I told this person that he is selfish but mainly because I was still very very angry with him.

I was angry because he told me I am creating a problem when in fact I was just trying to ask him some things about our HPLC equipment. Maybe I am creating a problem for him but I think I am just exposing the problem that he is so S-----D not to know much about our new HPLC equipment.

But what prompted me to say to him that he is selfish is when he said that it is not his responsibility to teach us about the HPLC equipment, when in fact, as far as everyone in the lab can remember he was asked to be the one responsible for that equipment and that includes learning as much as he can, preparing the standard operating procedure and teaching everyone how to operate it. Furthermore, he said that there is no teamwork in the lab for him and he works only for his research. What a selfish guy!

Sometimes we really really get so angry that we want to explode with anger and I was really at the point of cursing him but thanks to my family and to all the people that I have met before who taught me the value of control that the worst word I could say to him is only the word, selfish.
Waaahh!!!! but at that time I really thought that it was a disability for me not to be able to get angry and tell that person frankly that he is blah blah blah like my friends would have done...

Eversince, I have never been exposed to many situations that I really have to get angry. Thanks to my family and friends for loving me, for pampering me sometimes and for dealing with me in a nice way.

The sad thing is, when I get really really angry, I just cry...
When I am with my family, my mama would just hug me while I cry, my Kuya Edgar would let me punch him, my kuya Rony would pamper me and symphatize in his own way, my Ate Na would curse with me, Iping (a.k.a. Doc Jen) would really really take good care of me and tells me jokes and my Little Bani would just make me smile...


and my Adrian would do all of those things plus tons of jokes and fiunny faces to make me smile again...

But since I am in Taiwan, I missed them so much.
I miss my ANGER management team and I did realized how lucky I am to have them.
so I just cried...and the next day I was able to let it out to Alaine that I felt better.

I also felt better because I think of all the bad things that could happen to this selfish guy. But then this afternoon I read the blog of Candy Pangilinan in PEP.. (hehe)
She said that she read this story book to children. This is what caught my eye in her blog>

Jonah and the Whale talks about Jonah waiting for God to punish the Israelites. He was so full of jealousy and hatred because God easily forgave them...Cut..ouch! I am guilty of this. As I was reading it, I was getting really curious, why nga naman? Is it okay to be bad because God will forgive you anyway? The story ended with a simple remark, " God loves you and these people that hurt you. Do not wish for the misery of others. You cannot judge others because you too have done bad things in the past and was forgiven." What an epilogue for a story book.

Yep, so clear. I have to forgive this selfish guy who now I pity because he declared that he is not part of our team.

And to close all these hatred and anger to this selfish guy....ayy to this guy, I wrote this blog. :)

P.S. But I still won't talk to him..hehe..forgiveness takes time. ;)

an updated version of ME

Yep, I’m back! I’m back to blogging, I’m back to writing my thoughts but huhuhuhu, I’m also back in Taiwan.

I had a 2-week vacation in the Philippines to deal with my documents for DOST. Hays…but I won’t share that one for now, I’ll tell you about myself- yep, an updated version of me.

why????? see the picture when I went home to the Philippines.
and my picture days before I left for Taiwan...

aaaaayyy..maybe too small to notice but ei!!!!

..................................................................................
it maybe just a tiny dot in the picture but getting that dot really hurt.

I had my ears pierce..yep the dot I'm referring to is my new earrings.

waaaahhh!!!! it did hurt so much. It was so quick, they used a "gun", I just felt a searing heat followed by intense pain in my ears. And for hours after I had them pierced, I felt dazed, confused, afraid and shocked. If not for the greenwich pizza and blouse-shopping after, I would't be able to recover until the next day.

I haven't change my earrings, nor even tried to move them.
(still afraid..hihihi)

but nevertheless, with my ears pierced...
I really feel different!!! :)

Every time I look in the mirror, I see myself wearing different kinds of earrings..
hihihi..so exciting...

thanks ping! (my sister who was so courageous and
a little bit pushy to force me to endure ear piercing)

I'm really excited to wear beautiful earrings but waaaahhhhhh,

I still need to get over my fear that if I touch my earrings it would hurt again.

Anyways, I feel new not only because of my earrings but because I had my teeth clean and got retainers. thanks again ping (a.k.a DOC JEN)! I also had "facial" (hmmmnn...I dont know why they call it "facial"....hmmmnn....hehehe..maybe short for facial massage, facial cleaning, etc.)

and most of all I feel revived because I had a "vacation"......